Monthly Archives: January 2007


On the second-last day of my New Year’s Cruise, Sean and I joined our new friend Michelle on the waterslide a few times. At the bottom of the slide is a salt water pool, which naturally attracts one’s attention after leaving the slide. The three of us were in the pool when Sean started doing jackknifes, presumably in an attempt to cause the biggest splash possible (he maintains that a jackknife yields a better splash than a cannonball).

I thought maybe we could make a bigger splash if we did simultaneous cannonballs, so I said “Let’s do a double cannonball!” We got to adjacent corners, I counted down, then we did our cannonballs. Indeed there was a huge splash (I think… I was underwater), and when we surfaced, Michelle and the six or seven kids in the pool were laughing.

That’s when it hit me. “OK, let’s do a group cannonball!” We got back out of the pool and motioned for everyone to follow. Much to my surprise, everyone did so and distributed themselves along the perimeter.

“OK, point to where you’re jumping!” Everyone pointed. No collisions were evident. “On three… one… two… THREE!” SPLASH!

Upon surfacing I noticed two things: the water was white with post-splash foam, and everyone was laughing. Even the grown-ups.

We hung around and splashed around for a while, and did several more group cannonballs with the folks that drifted in and out of the pool. Everyone seemed to love it, and one girl who just watched the first time enthusiastically joined in when we immediately did it again.

It was so fun. Much more fun than it had any right to be. As Sean said, “I like how it takes two thirty something year-old guys to show the kids how to have fun.”

OK, I know what you’re thinking — “What’re you, twelve years old?” Yes. Yes, I am.

The Magic Victory Tour

Got back from our Carnival Victory cruise early Monday morning. It was a fantastic week, best described as a New Year’s Eve party that never ended. So much happened, we were busy pretty much every minute of every day. It was the longest period of time in years that I did not go on the internet.

What could have happened, you ask? We met a ton of people, some of whom were very interesting and a few people that I think will be friends for a long time. Sean’s luggage did not make it on the boat (it went onto the Carnival Valor, only to be seen again when we arrived back home), so that presented some special challenges and adventures. It’s a good thing we’re the same size.

So many memories… flight delayed to 2 AM and rerouted to Miami; tall Giedra; lost luggage; the Vaudeville act brothers (“We’re the thermometer brothers: I’m Oral, he’s Anal”); New Year’s Eve party; a smiling fellow who “won $1000” in the casino; Karaoke Rob every night; adorably cute Camilla from Finland; rented tuxes; our lovely Romanian waitress Sorvina; eye movement therapy demonstration from BodyTalk professional Janet; wandering on foot in Grand Cayman; a bike and kayak trip in Costa Maya; happy Michelle using way too many internet minutes; suave Brad from Air Force One; river tubing trip in Jamaica with Lauren and Ali; lame comedy; winning a $50 jackpot by drawing four deuces in Deuces Wild Poker; swimming; the water slide; group cannonball (my favourite!!); hot tubbing; sunning and sudoko; jokes jokes jokes jokes jokes, including the oft repeated lines “That’s what I’m talking about”, “That’s what she said” and “Too soon”; Micky’s balcony room; oh-so-sweet Liz; my FBI shirt; people that would only talk to us once; the beach in Miami; the slippery Australians; running into Ed at the Miami diner; the constant stream of food, especially the lobster and Warm Chocolate Melty Cake WOW; the “Jerked Pork Loin”; the Hickory Dickory Dock soup incident; the chocolate cake room service; laryngitis epidemic; Michelle’s birthday; baked Alaska; Kelly from Austin who loved to touch stomachs (shudder!); the disco with the TVs; the arguing family across the hall; sleeping late; staying up later; Christina’s saga that took her to Washington, DC; buffet open for photos only; cruise directors Tracy and Shelbyville; the Hungarians; the Legends show finale; the crazy old woman in the Newlywed Game; Dr. Kel and Tracy; the dog who would fetch money; phallic pylons; cute gamblin’ FAA rep Kris; Eric’s obsession with the cruise ship staff; the musical interludes during dinner which made a heck of a lot more sense if you participated; “Hips Don’t Lie”; VP Karen; party favours; evil Bruce; hammocks and lost sunglasses; the scuffle featuring super-intensive truck driver Frank; notorious Jeff from Boston and his karaoke intrusions; waiting forever for a cab at the port…

Next cruise, everyone is invited. Seriously.